*sigh*

I just feel like hating the whole world sometimes. I'm think I'm falling for this girl.. But it's probably not real. And there's also my ex that I care about. I do want to be with my ex but I know that I'm better off without her. And this girl.. I really am falling for her and she doesn't even know it. I dont even know how she feels about me. She's written my name in each of her last two blogs... which makes me wonder... but I dont want to get my hopes up yet I am. I hate how the smallest things will bring me down. I was having a pretty good day. just chilling in my bed.. needing the down time. when the clock hit 1 I started looking for her to come online, cause she should have been done work. she didn't come on till past 3. But when she did I got crazy mad butterflies in my tummy. How will she react? No matter how simple and unimportant words are, just writting them means something.. But how will that make her feel? Will she even realize that?

... I'm scared

To push her away;

To lose her;

To freak her out;

That she might care for me to...

I really do wish we hadn't...